CAN A LESBIAN BE A PASTOR?
Exploring The Christianity vs. Lesbianism Debate
“Marriage was tough and I was not interested in sex. Whenever we got intimate it was by force and I hated it,” narrates Jacinta Nzilani.
But the question is, is my sexual orientation yours, ours or mine? When people fornicate in the apartment block I live in, will I orgasm in my house? Why do people get so bothered by the decisions Jacinta made? We fail to live peacefully in this world because of discrimination and judgement. And this happens regardless of race, religion, sexuality or cultural norms.
It is human nature for people to judge and condemn what they do not understand. Jacinta Nzilani is an evangelist here in Nairobi. During an interview, she claimed that she had never been attracted to men and knew this as early as when she was sixteen years old.
Most people believe that homosexuality is a trait that people pick up to look cool but the evangelist says, ”It is not a habit, it is something that is inside me.”
Her upbringing led her to be a sister in a Catholic church but she was discouraged by a priest that fondled her. This led to her going back home. Her mother, who was very angered by her decision sought to marry her off at that tender age to a man roughly her age. The union, however, was not on mutual grounds but she had to stay in the marriage.
Parents had the tendency to see daughters as money bags in the olden days, therefore, being married off even at six years old was common. She was very unhappy but able to conceive three children, who support her today with regards to her sexuality. Jacinta even further explains that she did not enjoy being intimate with her husband and he used to force her into it.
After twenty-five years of marriage, her dear husband died as a result of cancer, that was in the year 2008. This was followed by a lot of mistreatment from the inlaws who blamed her for his death and even went further to inflict physical pain on her. Tragedy after tragedy followed her. She lost all the members of the church she used to minister in. But today we have the likes of Pastor Ng’ang’a who has numerous members in his church despite his odd ways of delivering ‘the word’.
Jacinta found love and is in a happy relationship right now, with a woman who also ministers. You can imagine being with someone for twenty-five years and every day when you look at yourself in the mirror, you feel and know you are not genuinely happy but you have to hold on for the sake of your children. Honestly, marriage is harder than what people see on social media.
Today, thee so righteous, so holy, so worthy christians can not let Jacinta prosper. Kenyans on twitter could not let this one go. Most people were calling her out for being an evangelist who is homosexual. For “giving a bad example to children and young people”. Well, if our children turn out to be what they learn about, why have I not yet invaded Poland seeing that I studied religiously about World War Two? Why have I never killed a single person and I watch documentaries and read biographies of serial killers?”
These same christians that are out here condemning her are the same people who break all the commandments. They kill because the bible does not specify what should not be killed therefore killing a goat or a lizard is still killing. They fornicate before they get marriage and the same bible states that sex is for marriage. They covet people’s wives and even accuse people falsely. There is no single christian especially in this Kenya that is pure. In fact, not just christians, everyone in general. We are all sinners, one way or another. Therefore, calling someone out for their sexuality is just total nonsense.
You cannot judge someone that has a speck in their eye when you have a log, not even that, a whole forest in yours. People should just let her be. There are ‘well respected’ pastors and priests out there that kill, rape and do horrible things to children, women and men. But they are still glorified at the end of the day.
Months ago there was a story surfacing of ‘gospel artists’ taking rounds with a young lady who ended up contracting a sexually transmitted disease. Another famous artist who switched from gospel to secular music was seen beating up his ex-girlfriend at the parking lot of their apartments.
We have no right to judge her for what she does with her body, as long as she is not harming anyone in the process. Drink water and mind your business honestly. Some of you guys would be really fit if you physically ran the same way you run your mouths.
At the end of the day, her sexual life is personal and if her family loves and supports her then she is good to go. This is a mind over matter situation. Those who mind don’t matter and those matter don’t mind.
This story is part of the Outsyder Weekly Magazine, Issue 30. You can read it for free here